What to do
by It'sJustMe555
Summary: My first Naitlyn one-shot. Well, my first ever one shot. T for language I guess : Nate-OOC. please review..


A month ago.

February, 21 2011.

Caitlyn's pov

I was on my way back home from shopping. We had no food at all in the fridge like nothing, and when I say nothing, trust me, I mean it.

I parked my dad's old car, which he gave for my 19 birthday and went, inside my lovely small apartment, which I share, with my lovely love…. bad joke. Never mind. Moving on.

You can say that Nate and I have been through a lot.

You see, his father used to hit him when he was young.

When he got older he promised himself that he would never hurt someone he loves the way his dad did.

And I was there, I was proud of him that he said that.

He said I changed him; I made him like this, "_A better person_."

But he just talked, and what he said, didn't exactly matched to what he did.

He hit me.

And more then once.

And I kept forgiving him every time.

He told me he loves me, and I guess I loved him that much that I believed him.

While putting stuff in their place I heard a knock I looked behind me and found Nate's keys. _'He forgot again his keys' _I thought, giggling to myself.

I went to open the door, and I was right, it was Nate.

"Hello there." He said with a wink. I rolled my eyes letting him in.

"Hey" I said smiling while locking the door behind him.

He put his stuff on the floor and looked at me.

I think he was about to say something but I guess he wasn't because I found his lips on mine.

Wow. Was the only thing that went through my mind.

I kissed him back without even thinking about it, smiling through the kiss, the way our lips move together.

I guess we were kind of making out like 16-year-old couple, even though we're 21.

But who the hell cares, right?

I guess air is something that kind of necessary these days, because I'm sure as hell this is the only reason we pulled away.

"Miss me Natey?" I said teasing him. Teasing Nate is like arguing with a 5-year-old boy about ice cream.

"So what if I did?" he said crossing his arms and stuck his toung out.

I laughed.

"Nate-"

'You got your way of speaking

Even the air you-re breathing

You could be any-'

My cell was ringing, I trying to find it while singing with my Demi Lovato ring ton.

Found it! Wi-pi-di-do.

"Hello?" I said. "Caitlyn? Hey, how are you? It's Josh."

Ou-oh.

"Hey josh, I'm fine thanks how are you?" I said, a little bit afraid about what Nate is thinking about.

Don't get me wrong, yeah? It not like I was cheating on him but Josh and me had a past before I met Nate and well…let's just say Nate doesn't like him that much.

"Same here." There was a silence between us for a few seconds I looked up at Nate to look at his expression, which wasn't exactly something I could read. expression that was mixed with so many feelings that I couldn't even find one.

So I moved my gaze back to the floor.

I decided to break the silence; eventually, Josh is a very shy guy.

"So what's up? Do you need anything?"

"Oh! Yeah! Right, umm well.. Umm.. There's umm…"

What? I couldn't understand what the hell he was saying except for all the "umm" things.

I heard him taking a deep breath; I guess he wanted to start the sentence over again.

I waited quietly.

"Ok, so you see, there is that really good job that I want to get but I need to pass some weird test in physics. And well I remembered you were always good at this so I was thinking maybe you can help me?" "But Josh, you used to get an amazing grades at physics back in high school." "naaaah I was just cheating, writing all the answers on my hand before the test." He said, laughing about the old memories and I joined him.

"Well sure, I'd love to help I'll call you later to decide when, ok?" "Ok, thank you."

"Sure, bye" I said and hanged up.

Looking up again was a bad decision but I did. '_ he won't hurt me, right? He promised, and the last time that happened was a few months ago so it has to be ok.'_

"So…. How was your day?" I said. "Fine."

Ouch. That sounds cold. "What wrong? Are you mad at me or something?" "No. Why would I be mad at you? I don't care; you can go fuck this Josh dude how much that you'd like. I really don't fucking care."

I guess that this time my expression was unable to read.

I was hurt, I was mad, I was upset, I was disappointment, and I was shocked.

I felt the tears feel my eyes but I tried to hold them.

"Excuse me?" was the only thing that I could have said.

"You heard me. I don't care." "I can't believe you just said this." I took a deep breath.

"Do you honestly think I would ever do something like this? This is what you think about me?" that was the moment I guess I just couldn't hold the tears anymore even though I wanted. "This is what you think about me?" I repeated myself "Don't you know me? Like, at all? You know I love you more then anything, how could you say this?"

I was literally screaming at him, which I realized wasn't a good thing to do when I felt myself being pushed on the wall and a strong hand on my throat.

I closed my eyes.

I was scared. I opened slowly my eyes to find Nate looking at me with anger and his fist in the air.

I don't really know what happened after that, I think I screamed or something like this, but the next thing I knew I opened my eyes in a white room, lying on an uncomfortable bed, with a headache and apparently a broken arm. I looked around to find Nate staring at me, murmuring something like "I'm so sorry"

I don't think he realized I was awake.

I tried to reach my head, but failed at that. It hurts so badly.

And with a blink of an eye. A chubby short nurse, she looked like 50 years old, with a blond hair and blue eyes. she looked like a sweet person. I tried to smile.. Well at least I tried, right?

"How are you feeling Caitlyn?" "I don't really know, my head hurts."

I think that by that time Nate realized I was awake.

"well how my mother used to say? If your head hurts, it means that you have a head, right?" she smiled, trying to make me feel better. I gave her a weak smile.

She checked some stuff and left the room not before saying she'll be back soon and if I need anything I can click on this weird bottom. I thanked her and after she left I turned my aching head back to Nate.

"Cait, I am so so so so sorry, you have no idea, I am so sorry for hurting you like this. I wasn't thinking, at all. I had a long day at work, all I wanted was just to be with you and then this Josh dude called and… I'm just truly sorry. I love you."

He finished, trying to catch his breathe.

I looked at him with the only question that went through my mind, _'should I forgive him or not?_'

My heart said '_yes_'.

My brain said _'no_'.

But it's not the first time that something like that happens and we both know it.

I had to be smart and strong.

Present.

March, 19 2011.

I'm on my way to the dancing studio at the moment, I'm teaching today.

With one hand on the steering wheel and the other one by the window with my head resting on it.

I heard my phone rings, I changed my ring ton to a regular vibrate, the old one just reminds me to much from the nearby past. "Hello?…yes sir…don't worry sir… I'm on my way! I'll be there in two minuets"

I was late; again, having the same dream every night for the past 4 weeks didn't help me.

Waking up from the same dream about the last time I saw him.

It had been a month since then. Since the day I decided that listening to my heart hurts to much and for once I need to be smart.

I told Nate that I'm sorry but I don't want him in my life any more.

I miss him.

I love him.

But eventually it will pass. It has to.

Is it?


End file.
